How Mad Jay does… Doubt.

I run a lot of games inside of a year. Online games, games at conventions, games for my FLGS, games at home. What never gets old is my ancient rival, Doubt showing up and always unexpectedly. He’s upstairs now making coffee… using my good stuff too!

At last, we meet again for the first time, for the last time!

I’m on a flight tomorrow morning to L.A. OrcCon by way of Phoenix, AZ. I’ll run games for Games on Demand, I’m doing a panel about Fearless Facilitating and I’ll play and run some games ‘off the books’. Doubt, however, is here to sabotage my mojo, get inside my head and rattle me.

“You haven’t run that in YEARS!!! WTF are you thinking!”

“You’ve NEVER ran that game — get realz!”

“You sure you got enough prep in?”

Convention trips to new venues, new faces, Doubt is especially bold.

“Who do you think you are?”

I have an older friend that reminds me of who I am, Experience. She reminds me of the games I’ve run, good and bad. Shows me the books of handwritten notes and maps and all the stuff GMs keep post-game as proof that I have done this task before, I’ve faced this doubt before.

“Remember that crazy late night 8 player Urban Shadows game they made you run in New Mexico”

“Or that family of never played a RPG you taught Burning Wheel to?”

“Or that time in Budapest…”

She says keep being genuine, and honest with your players at the table. Keep finding and sharing the fun you found in the games you run. Pack two easy-win games you know stone-cold and pack that game you’re excited to get off the ground. And extra underwear and socks, like grandma says.

Then she repeats a favorite movie line of mine, gets me. Every. Single. Time. Always.

“The way it works is, you do the thing you’re scared shitless of, and you get the courage AFTER you do it, not before you do it.”

— Archie Gates, Three Kings.

Coffee’s ready. See Y’all at OrcCon, let’s play some games.

“Mad Jay” Brown is a polyhedral dice pool. He has written The Clockwinders for Fate RPG, PRIME Supers for Cortex Prime RPG and By Acer’s Light for Burning Wheel and Dungeon World RPGs. He is the host of the Diceology, a podcast about gamers and a GM-for-hire currently running 40+ player West Marches RPG at Into The Mad Lands. He likes games and stories about outsiders and underdogs. Jay games with his kids and loves his momma but she doesn’t game…yet.